We all make mistakes. We are flawed human beings.

More importantly, we are all capable of change. We are adaptive beings.

I’ve been the victim of a story but I’ve also been the criminal of the story.

I’m not talking about drug and alcohol addiction. I’m not talking about illegal doings.

I’m talking about hurting another human being. I’m also talking about being addicted to attention…to validation…to love.

Admittedly, I’m very insecure with myself and I often find that distracting myself with success and projects kept my head away from the fact that I’m never going to be enough. Of course, I love everything that I do now and have done. I’m proud of who I am and who I’ve learned to become.

However, my insecurities were rooted in me at a very young age. Being told I’m this or that or should be this and that…kept me in a forceful middle, seeking approval from both ends. As I got older, I find that all I needed to do was follow what I want and learned to walk away/let go. But it wasn’t always easy and I’ve made tons of mistakes while being hooked on acceptance and validation.

I loved deeply and hurt deeply. I’ve walked away cowardly. I’ve lost touch with people I still cared about. But that’s life and it’s something that needs to be learned, whether it’s the hard way or not.

You have to make mistakes and you have to fail. You have to learn to battle something hard and challenge yourself to be a better version of yourself.

Perhaps the greatest mistake one can make is to never learn from making them. Making the same mistakes over and over because they’re still in denial or still hooked on acceptance/validation.

Our brains process love (from others or someone) the same way it processes cocaine. It’s addictive.

Once we learn to let go, love ourselves, forgive ourselves, and learn from our mistakes…that is where we find growth, have the ability to gather the strength to displace that addiction, and find peace in exactly who we are and who we want to be.

I wrote this article because I find that I’ve become happier as I’ve gotten older. Learning and growing and accepting are all crucial to doing that. It’s even more so…when I’m self-aware and I recognize my weaknesses and the psychology behind who I am today.

I’ve learned recently that….you have control over your happiness. You really do. Scientifically so. Although 50% of it is genetics, 40% of it is intentional activity and 10% of it is circumstances. I understand and recognize that there are mental illnesses but if you don’t…most likely, you can change how you’re feeling everyday if you make it a state of mind. So take charge of your life, live for you, and let go of what’s stopping you from getting there.


Annie 🙂

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