People have talked about the act of love for centuries. Nowadays, everything we consume revolves around the concept of love: self-love, platonic love, familial love, and romantic love. I find myself writing a love article once every couple of months because love continues to inspire me.
Love takes on many forms for me, and it evolves as I evolve. In my dating experiences, I found that romantic love often happens unexpectedly. However, just as love happens, so does heartbreak. I would love to share those experiences with those who feel a little hopeless when it comes to love. Love and heartbreak are going to happen more than once in a lifetime. That’s just how life is 🙂 I want to normalize it and to be a guiding hand to those who feel alone in their experiences
So here is a list of romantic love I’ve experienced so far and how they have shaped me:
The Puppy Love
Young love. The kind of love that happens when you’re young, naive, and eager. Everything done by the other person perpetuates a rush of emotions, raw and unfiltered. It’s always great until it’s not. Most times, it’s a roller coaster ride with many highs and lows. When you’re with this person, you learn a lot about yourself and the other person. Although sometimes this love is strong and can last a while, love still fades with time. It’s often because both individuals are young and growing up into their own person.
This love taught me that love is not enough, and heartbreak happens simply because of timing. When you’re young, you don’t really know what love is. Not the kind of love that lasts forever, at least. This love, looking back, was very codependent. When two people are young in love, they don’t get to work on their relationship with themselves. It can lead to toxicity and a relationship that is difficult to end.
The Painful and Addictive Love
That is the love that started amazing, and you begin to believe this person might be the one. You always think about them, and you care about them deeply. The mutual love, trust, and respect inspire you to keep loving them. However, one day, something no longer fits. To justify staying, you think about all the good times. Bad timing isn’t enough of a reason to walk away, so you stay and wait. When you get heartbroken, you break down into a thousand pieces. This heartbreak feels like your physical heart stopped beating for a minute, and you’re always trying to catch your breath. It hurts so bad that you feel like you’re dying.
This love taught me that love only happens if it goes both ways. If that love is no longer there, no amount of memories is enough to sustain it. I learned to stop resuscitating a relationship that has flat-lined a long time ago. Negatively, this love made my heart colder and guarded. However, once I forgive myself and the other person for the pain felt and given, I’m a lot stronger than I ever was.
The Could Have Been Love
That happens quite a lot throughout life. It’s the kind of love that you feel through mutual closeness and friendship. It evolves into something more, but it’s not quite enough. The timing puts a stop to any further romantic developments. Both individuals want something more, but it’s not realistic without foreseeing possible heartbreak due to timing. Although less brutal, it still hurts. It may lead to a confusing friendship full of distracting chemistry.
Through this love, I learned that it is uncontrollable. Positively, this love taught me the value of friendship above all. Although love didn’t happen, platonic love is still visibly there. Quite frankly, I feel that it lasts longer too. If two individuals can separate their feelings from the friendship, then it will be worth it!
The Heartbreaker Love
That is the kind of love where you find yourself caring for someone deeply, but romantic feelings don’t run deep enough for you. You try to develop those feelings for them, but the chemistry is not there. Everything else feels right, but to salvage the friendship, you walk away.
In this love, I learned that I wouldn’t always be the one being heartbroken. Breaking someone’s heart is just as painful, sometimes. I had to say things that would hurt the other person, and if not careful, the friendship doesn’t continue afterward. I was probably the villain in other people’s love stories. Although it sucks, it was a humbling love experience. I learned what it was like to be on the receiving end of unrequited love.
There are more types of romantic love, but these are the ones I have experienced. It’s full of tears, laughter, friendship, and stories that I would love to document one day. But what I hope this article did for you is to remind you how human it is to experience love and heartbreak simultaneously. Although it happens on many levels and in many other ways, romantic love is always one hell of a story to tell.